When I’m 84

From 2012-2014, I worked at the March Air Reserve Base Exchange (BX). For those not familiar with it, it is a military department store selling everything from electronics to clothing and jewelry, to food to toys and garden supplies. I had a lot of crazy tales about customers I told to friends and family to either blow off steam or have a good laugh. These customers ranged from wives using their husbands’ coin collections to pay for shopping carts full of merchandise to a retired colonel shoplifting the tiny bottles of booze.

There were also sad stories about Vietnam War and Gulf War veterans having full blown rages or meltdowns and working with a female retiree to find service dress blues and all the earned ribbons to go on it—she was planning her own funeral due to terminal cancer.

But there is one particular customer who touched my heart in a way that I will never forget. This happened in the early days when I was just a sales associate before I became a supervisor at Military Clothing Sales within the BX.

I was working on a Monday when I saw an elderly gentleman I had chatted with once before. Brightly, I asked, "How are you doing today, sir?"

He smiled and said, "I am blessed. Every day I wake up on this earth is a blessing!" Then he happily and quite loudly announced he had just turned 84 years old.

Did I hear him right? I knew he was elderly, but I would have never guessed he was that old. I stepped back from my register and said, "There's no way! You can't possibly be eighty-four!"

He smirked and said, "Yes, I'm eighty-four!"

I told him that he looked fantastic and that he did not look the age he claimed to be. Suddenly, he stopped and stared at me. I paused uneasily, thinking I had insulted him until he said, "Sooooooooo...tell me...what does eighty-four look like?"

Before I could even form an answer in my head, he pointed a finger up in the air and said, "I'll show you what eighty-four looks like!"

He began the funniest thing I had seen in a long time. He wandered off in one direction pretending he was using a walker. He shuffled his feet, jerked his body around, and stammered while mumbling nonsense. Then he began making hacking and wheezing noises.

My co-worker who was at the register behind mine stopped what she was doing and began to watch while laughing. Then the man moved in the other direction making motions with his hands. He paused—looking at us just for a second—to make sure we knew he was mimicking being in a wheelchair. Once again, he made a hilarious display of what he thought we thought 84 typically looks like. My co-worker and I couldn't stop laughing.

When he was done with his one-man show, he grew very serious. He came back to my register and leaned in so he could make sure that we heard his message. He told us those are the people who sit in front of their televisions all day long, refuse to engage in life, and don't take care of their health. He said all they do is complain. He ranted that they have a terrible attitude about their lives and the world around them. When you do nothing but complain, your life is wasted. He wanted to know what was the use of complaining if you weren't going to do anything about it?

He told us that after he retired from nearly 30 years in the military, he had six drinking and smoking buddies. All they did all day was “slam back the beers and liquor, light up the smokes,” and talk about the things they had done and been in the past.

With great sadness in his eyes, he held out six fingers. One by one, he folded each one back into his palms as he recounted how each one died well before their time.

His wake up call came the day the sixth friend died. He realized he was the only one left, and that he was going to follow if he didn’t change things. He looked at his life (he was in his early 60s then) and realized he had not contributed “a damn thing to life” since he retired. He and his friends talked plenty of what they had done in the past, but none of them ever talked about what they were going to do presently and in the future.

Then a quote from the bible came to him, which said something about not hastening your days here on earth. He realized that by drinking and smoking, he was doing just that. He had already put one foot in the grave and the other one was soon to follow.

He thought about his father who had been a two star general in the military. He told us, "My dad was a two star general. A TWO STAR GENERAL! A successful black man who could have continued to do great things! But he died from a heart attack at the age of fifty-seven. He didn't love himself enough to take care of himself.” He clenched his hands and brought them up to his face in frustration. “Those drinks and smokes!"

He decided in the very next moment that he had to change his life. He had to be the one in the group who made it to the very end. So that day, he gave up the cigarettes and alcohol. He began to exercise by walking. He gave up the television and began to read books again. He did puzzles to keep his mind sharp. He started to live life again.

He decided his life was worth something, and he was going to live it to the fullest. He didn't know how many years he had left in him, but he would go out with no regrets when the time did come.

My co-worker and I were spellbound during his entire speech. We didn't say a word, only nodding as his words sank in. I was seeing flashes of my own life in my mind and I’m pretty sure the same was happening to her.

After I handed my customer his change, he did a little dance as he moved away from my register to show us how spry he still was at the age of 84. When he walked away, that's when the spell broke and I looked down to realize that he had left his bag of merchandise behind.

I felt a jolt coming out of the deep thoughts about my own life, bringing me back to the present moment. I called out, "Sir! Sir! You forgot your bag!"

He bowed his head sheepishly, let out a snort, and walked back to retrieve it. He said, "Well, despite all that I said, I guess not all is perfect at the age of eighty-four."

After retrieving his bag, he walked out of the store and out of my life forever as I never saw him again. Soon after, I was promoted and became the supervisor of military clothing sales—a separate facility within the BX. But his story had walked into my heart and stayed forever. For my co-worker and I that day, it was an enchanting moment and life lesson to always remember.